BTN News: From a young age, Michael Vargas Arango knew there was something different about him. Growing up in MedellÃn, Colombia, Michael often felt the presence of something unexplainable, a sensation that grew stronger in certain places or around specific people. While some around him believed he possessed a rare, divine gift, these experiences gradually became a source of torment for him. The weight of these feelings, coupled with the challenges of understanding his own mind, led Michael down a path of confusion, isolation, and ultimately, a desperate attempt to end his life. But this was not where his story would end. Now, as a 22-year-old psychology student in Miami, Michael is using his experiences to challenge the stigmas surrounding mental health disorders, particularly those associated with schizoaffective disorder and schizophrenia.
Michael’s early years in the tumultuous Comuna 13 of MedellÃn were marked by solitude and a peculiar connection to an imaginary friend named Felipe. While his mother saw him playing alone, Michael recalls the vivid presence of Felipe, a friend who seemed as real as anyone else. This perception led his devoutly Catholic mother to seek spiritual guidance, fearing her son was communicating with the dead or possessed. As time passed, these experiences, coupled with his interactions with Felipe, reinforced the belief among those around him that Michael had a unique ability—a gift of sensing energies that others could not.
However, as Michael grew older and his family relocated to Envigado, his life improved in some ways. He was able to engage in normal childhood activities, like playing sports and making friends. Yet, the strange sensations he experienced only intensified, especially during emotional lows. Michael began to notice a disturbing dissonance between his actions and his memories, often feeling as though he was not fully in control of his own body. He described it as sharing his mind with someone else, a feeling that left him questioning the reality of his own experiences.
These unsettling experiences culminated in a mental and emotional breakdown that led Michael to attempt suicide. It was a moment of utter despair, driven by the belief that he was “crazy” and could contribute nothing positive to the world. Fortunately, he survived the attempt, and it was this rock-bottom moment that propelled him to seek the psychiatric help he so desperately needed. It was then that Michael was diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder—a complex condition that combines symptoms of schizophrenia with mood disorder symptoms like depression and mania—and emotionally unstable personality disorder.
Coming to terms with his diagnosis was both a relief and a challenge for Michael. It provided a framework for understanding his experiences, but it also forced him to confront the deep-seated stigmas associated with mental illness. He realized that he was now one of the “crazy” people he had once been so afraid of, and this realization pushed him to educate himself and others about his condition. Michael learned that schizophrenia and related disorders often have a genetic component and that environmental factors can trigger the onset of these conditions. Reflecting on his own life, he suspects that a traumatic incident of abuse in his childhood may have played a role in the development of his disorder.
Despite the difficulties, Michael has managed to build a relatively normal life for himself. He is pursuing a degree in psychology at Miami Dade College and is in a supportive relationship with someone who understands and cares for him. Yet, the struggle to overcome societal prejudices continues, both in the way others view him and in how he views himself. A pivotal moment in this ongoing battle was his participation in a podcast competition organized by NPR. Motivated by a desire to change perceptions, Michael created an eight-minute podcast titled “The Monsters We Create,” which won the NPR Podcast Challenge. In it, he uses haunting sound effects and personal narration to convey what it’s like to live with schizoaffective disorder, challenging listeners to reconsider their views on mental illness.
Today, Michael Vargas Arango is on a mission to dismantle the negative stereotypes surrounding mental health disorders. He emphasizes that everyone has their own struggles, but these challenges do not define one’s worth or capabilities. Through his story, Michael hopes to inspire others who are dealing with similar issues to seek help, educate themselves, and refuse to be limited by the stigmas that society often imposes on those with mental health conditions. His journey is a powerful reminder that, even in the face of profound adversity, it is possible to find strength, purpose, and a path forward.
