In a world often defined by its chaos, it can be easy to lose touch with our emotional well-being. Life’s trials—personal struggles, conflicts, or the weight of everyday pressures—sometimes drive us to places we can’t navigate alone. But when do we know it’s time to seek help? The answer, much like life itself, is nuanced and deeply personal.
As we become more attuned to the importance of mental health, the stigma of seeking psychological support has begun to lift. Yet, for many, the question lingers: How do I know if I should go to therapy? This uncertainty is common, but it’s in the very act of asking that we begin to uncover the answer.
The Subtle Signs: When Is It Time to Ask for Help?
There comes a moment, often quiet but profound, when we feel the need to pause and reflect on our emotional landscape. According to Rafael San Román, a psychologist and expert in grief counseling and third-generation psychological therapies, “Going to a psychologist isn’t something that should be feared or stigmatized—it’s a step toward healing, especially when you can no longer bear your burdens alone.”
The reasons for seeking therapy vary. Some struggle with persistent insomnia, crippling anxiety, or an overwhelming sense of being stuck. Others face more subtle signs—an unshakable feeling of sadness or disconnection that taints their daily interactions. If you’re finding it difficult to navigate these emotions, it may be time to seek professional support.
At times, the problems seem external: issues with family, relationships, or work. But beneath the surface, these struggles can deeply affect our emotional well-being. Therapy helps not only to address the symptoms but to find the roots of the distress.
When should you see a psychologist? Trust your intuition. If you’ve found yourself overwhelmed—emotionally, physically, or mentally—or if you’ve been battling a problem you can’t seem to resolve, it’s worth considering therapy. Often, the act of reaching out becomes the first step in regaining control.
The Complexity of Healing: Why One Size Doesn’t Fit All
Therapy is not a quick fix, nor is it a one-size-fits-all solution. Each journey is different, as are the methods and duration of the therapy. “Some people need just a few sessions, while others may benefit from a longer, more involved process,” says San Román.
Healing, much like the seasons, ebbs and flows. There are moments of clarity followed by times of deep introspection. The important thing is not the length of therapy, but rather the effect it has on your life. Each session should serve as a small beacon of light, guiding you toward the change you need.
It’s not uncommon to feel uncertain after the first session. Some may find immediate relief, while others need time to connect with their therapist. San Román emphasizes the importance of finding a therapist you feel comfortable with—someone who listens, understands, and offers insights that resonate. “If you don’t feel comfortable with the first therapist, don’t be afraid to find someone else,” he advises. “The therapeutic relationship is key to the process.”
Common Struggles: Identity, Family, Work, and Relationships
In his book ‘¿Qué le cuento a mi psicólogo?’, San Román highlights four recurring themes that often lead people to therapy: identity, family, work, and relationships. These aren’t just passing concerns; they shape the very fabric of our lives.
For some, the crisis may be deeply personal—a struggle with identity or self-esteem that has lingered for years. Others may find themselves in constant conflict with their partner, feeling as if every conversation is a battle. And then there are those who thrive in their careers but find their personal life in shambles, or vice versa.
While the reasons for seeking therapy vary, what unites them all is the desire to find peace. Therapy isn’t just about addressing what’s wrong; it’s about understanding why certain patterns repeat themselves and finding new ways to live with purpose.
The Impact of the Modern World: Stress Beyond Our Control
It’s not just our internal struggles that drive us to therapy. According to the United Nations (UN), global challenges such as the lingering effects of COVID-19, climate change, and ongoing conflicts have exacted a heavy toll on mental health worldwide. These external pressures seep into our lives, often amplifying personal struggles.
In 2023, a study conducted by the Ministry of Health in Colombia revealed that while 93.7% of respondents valued mental health, nearly 71% said they had never been asked about their emotional well-being during routine medical visits. This gap highlights the importance of prioritizing mental health, not just as an individual responsibility, but as a societal one.
Choosing the Right Therapist: It’s Okay if It Takes Time
The relationship between you and your therapist is crucial to the healing process. San Román stresses the importance of finding someone with whom you feel safe and heard. Sometimes, the connection isn’t immediate, and that’s okay. Therapy, after all, is a deeply personal experience, and it requires a level of trust that can take time to build.
If the first therapist doesn’t feel like the right fit, don’t hesitate to explore other options. Whether you need someone of a similar age, gender, or cultural background, it’s vital to feel understood in a space designed for vulnerability. “Therapy should feel like a space where you can share without judgment, where you can work through the deepest parts of yourself,” San Román says.
Ultimately, therapy is a commitment to yourself. It’s a promise to engage in a process that honors your mental and emotional health, even when it’s difficult. Healing isn’t a straight path, but it’s a journey worth taking.
